Kate's Ramblings

A day-to-day insight to the world of the struggling artist... live vicariously!

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

I'm singing in the rain...

So, I'm sitting at work with nothing to do. Actually, truly, nothing to do. I don't expect that this will last very long. However, I can't complain too much for now.

Still waiting on that school gig. I'm beginning to realize that the administration doesn't care too much about it, and that really saddens me. My entire career was built upon the foundations of my experiences in the Susquehannock Drama Department. I recognize that not every student will want to pursue acting, however, theatre has so much more to offer to young people then just acting careers. Well, they did say this week and it is only Tuesday...

So it looks like the camping trip has been moved up to this weekend. Provided Brian hasn't forgotten about some prior obligation (sorry, had to put it in there!!!). I'm really excited about it. I don't think I've been camping since before my parents got divorced (12 years ago!?!) I'm hoping to take my camera and get some get autunm leaves pictures. (maybe some pics of Brian too... ;-) )

Off to help Shannon with college essays... I love being a big sister.

Monday, September 27, 2004

Monday, once again...

Well, the Garden has closed. I'm glad. It was a good experience, but still, I'm ready to move on to other things. Ben came down for the day to see the show. He, Brian and I went to TOG of all places for lunch. It was nice to have Brian and Ben meet each other. They both seemed to like the other, so that makes me happy.

Brian was down for the entire weekend. That was a nice treat for me. He got here in time for the Broadway Cares/Equity Fights Aids Benefit Cabaret that the cast did. He saw the show Saturday night, and then Sunday after lunch he headed back to State College. Every time we spend together we grow a little bit more. This weekend was no exception, although the end of it saw a little bit of a crossroad. We'll get through. That much I believe.

Anyhow, I'm feeling a bit melancholy this morning. So, I guess it's time for coffee and a shower. I start my new job this afternoon. Yay!

Thursday, September 23, 2004

I apologize for this sappy moment...

I was thinking about a certain someone who has become amazingly important to me in a very short period of time. And something made me really happy. Giddy, actually. It's that first moment when I see him after being apart, that I feel a burst of pure joy. I hope that never goes away. I can't wait to see him tomorrow...

What day is it again???

Considering I'm not sure what day it is... it's been a wacky few days.

Yesterday was the feared understudy rehearsal. Most bizarre experience ever. It started the night before when Michael announced that everyone should come and watch the understudies perform. Perform???? Um. Performance would indicate a rehearsal of some sort. hahahaha. Really, it was fine. All eight of us were very nervous, but we got through it. (Even our 7 foot "Dickon" managed ok.) Absolutely no direction was given, and we could barely hear the piano, as it was in the pit and we were on stage with no monitors of any kind. What a sigh of relief we all felt when it was over...

Kids' show today. sigh. Almost overslept. Almost. Also had an interview for a day job at York College. I think it went really well. I felt very comfortable and I feel that they responded well to me. Yay. Here's hoping.

Show tonight.

Tomorrow is crazy day from hell. 10am Cabaret rehearsal, 1pm School meeting, 3pm Lessons, 7:30pm Call for Show, 11pm Cabaret. Factor in driving back and forth to Lancaster twice. Maybe I can convince Brian to drive me home tomorrow night and I'll leave the car at the theatre.... hmmm.... there's an idea...

All I can really think about at the moment is a nap... and cleaning. Must clean room before Brian comes down...

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

I'm as corny as Kansas in August

amazing weekend.

Brian came down for the Secret Garden cookout at Jessica's house on Sunday. Unfortunately the 2 hour ride took six because of the flooding in Harrisburg and surrounding areas. So, instead of heading back he came to my house for the night with the intention of going back to school early in the morning. When we woke up in the morning and watched the news he decided to hang around for the day because the roads were still closed. :-) Aside from our day of 4 wheeling and stargazing, this was the first day we got to spend together. So we slept in! and then went out to lunch and to Borders. Then to my mom's so I could teach and Brian could get some school work done. We had dinner with the fam and then hung around to watch tv for the evening. We didn't do much but it was an almost perfect day. Brian stayed again last night and left for school early this morning.

I'm so lucky. and happy...

Brian, no worries, ok?!

Lots to do today. starting with a shower...

Friday, September 17, 2004

Rain drops keep falling on my head

What a perfect rainy day. I know it's hurricane rain, but I don't care. I kinda wish I could just stay in and curl up with a movie and a Brian, but alas, I must go to work and earn some money, and Brian's probably knee deep in preparing for auditions anyhow. It's also Dave and Fran's anniversary so they are probably just waiting for me to get out of the house! HA!

I've decided that I am going to work over at the Dance Shoppe. Between that and teaching, I think I'll be ok. I registered with a bunch of temp places online today, so worse case I can do that. My Mantra: Everything works out as it should. I just need to chill out a bit. School thing is still out there. I have another interview/meeting with folks up there next Friday. If we don't get a move on thought there won't be enough time to produce a show!

Ok, enough... off to act for a bit.

bedtime once again.

5 shows since Tuesday. Good grief. Don't have to be at the theatre for another 18 hours or so....

I love this. I'm sitting in front of the tv, laptop out, watching M*A*S*H (the best sitcom of all time, no matter what anyone else says...) drinking a glass of wine and chatting with Meghan and Adam. I'm sleepy, but i'm kinda waiting to see if Brian logs on... I'm pathetic. Just hush, I already know it.

So the grand job search begins for a day job. Let me know if anyone hears of anything. Just say no to TOG! (my new motto).

Thursday, September 16, 2004

things that make you go hmmm


Interesting conversation tonight. Ah, days of youth.... really makes me think about some things...


Wednesday, September 15, 2004

sleepy time

2 show day tomorrow... sigh... fortunately photocall wasn't too hellish.

Brian got cast in Measure For Measure - YAY!!! Can't wait to hear all the details.

It's 2:30 am and I'm still up. What is wrong with me? I'm going to pay for this for sure sometime during the second act of the matinee. argh. Not too anxious to get in my bed,if you know what I mean... exhaustion, please!

Monday, September 13, 2004

Random thoughts for Monday

Hot date with Colette tonight and audition for Proof at Open Stage of Harrisburg.

I've been working on some music for the hoardes of auditions coming up. Colette must have taught me something because my belt is finding a new home and it's really comfortable for me. I bet it's from taking a break and doing all this legit singing in Secret Garden. Who knows? Who cares? I'm happy about it.

Song of the day, stuck in my head:

Annie's Other Song
by John Denver

I'm bringing me home to you, that's all that I have to give,
my life, my love, my everything, it's you I choose to be with.

Had a wonderful time in the city, I smile when I recall.
The space, the songs, the company, I really had a ball.
It's a funny set of circumstances, sends me out on the road alone.
With the moon looking over my shoulder, I'm finding my way back home.
I'm bringing me home to you, that's all that I have to give.
My life, my love, my everything, it's you I choose to be with.

Riding high in the Rocky Mountains, they're quiet and peaceful times.
I'd swear the stars are smiling like they know what's on my mind.
You see, on any such an occasion, my thoughts will turn to you.
The time I spend all by myself I mostly spend with you.
I'm bringing me home to you, that's all that I have to give.
My life, my love, my everything, it's you I choose to be with.

When I lay down beside you, all the love that you show.
I wanna live my life with you, it's all the dreams that I know.
I'm bringing me home to you, that's all that I have to give.
My life, my love, my everything, it's you I choose to be with,
it's you I choose to be with, it's you I choose to be with, it's you I choose to be with.

Yeah, I still miss Brian.

Saturday, September 11, 2004

The Sweetest Man on Earth...

Perhaps it's because he spent the summer in the "sweetest place on earth," but I am definately dating the sweetest man on earth. At 2am when my phone rang, it was Brian, asking me to let him in. Um, Brian is supposed to be in State College, 3 hours away. He missed me. So he drove down to see me. It's exactly the kind of thing that I would do and my dad would roll his eyes at the spontaneity and the effort.

We are so perfect for one another.

Life is very very good... (except that he had to go back this morning!)

Was it written in the stars?

The stars were so gorgeous tonight, that I wished I was laying on a blanket in the middle of a meadow, somewhere within the mountains of central Pennsylvania. Thank you for that wonderful gift weeks ago. It will obviously stay with me forever.

Friday, September 10, 2004

To Anna: (part 2)


Okay, my philospohy on life has been (for the past few years) to be ultimately happy. If it doesn't make you happy, don't do it, or find a way to be happy in life's difficult moments. Happiness can be found in the simplest moments of peace, the beauty of a waterfall, or laughter with some wonderful friends. It can also come from within by believing in oneself and taking pride in who you are. So, when I come across people not taking the initiative to find happiness, I unfortunately tend to unfairly judge them as "weak." Weak because they have let outside factors, out of their control, take over their life and have lost themself to a lack of confidence and fear. I'm definately a "glass is half full" kind a girl.

Anna, I don't hate you. I apologize for hurting you. I wish you happiness... in the worst possible way. But I believe that you need to find it within yourself, before you can find it in the world. You have so much hate thriving inside you right now, for me, for Seth... I don't know. You can call me all the nasty names you want, but it won't hurt me and it won't help you. Just take a breath, and then take the first step of your new life...

Mrs. Winthrop

Mrs. Winthrop
Originally uploaded by actorkate.

Hahahaha! I love this picture... This is me as the spinster headmisstress in The Secret Garden at the Fulton Opera House. I have the funniest scene in the show as I try to take a reluctant Mary Lennox off to boarding school. Give me a bike and call me "Gulch"...

To Anna:

Wow, so apparently Anna reads this thing. Who knew. I don't know what she thinks my feelings for Seth are, but I'm pretty sure she's entirely wrong in her thinking. I had very little to do with the break up, except remind Seth of who he is. He and I went through a lot a bad stuff together, hurt each other and have finally finally made amends. Those amends don't include getting back together, no matter what Anna or anyone else may think. We are friends, who barely have time to talk anymore... I'm sorry that Anna seems to think I had any thing to do with this. I feared I might early on, and Seth assured me that I didn't, and that he was making all decisions on his own. So in an effort not to revert back to middle school cattiness, I won't write anymore about it here. Anna, I'm sorry for you... but I'm most definately not the bad guy here.

just off the phone...

...I think I might be the luckiest girl in the whole entire world.

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

...but here I am, very glad to be unhappy...

Almost two whole days without you-know-who. I'm pathetically cute, I know... It hits me at two very specific times of day: waking up in the morning and driving home late at night. Truth is, I'm happy to be sad though. I'm content knowing he's even there in the first place.

Interestingly enough, I've been entertaining myself with Seth and Anna's weblogs. Well, just Anna's actually. Seth rarely updates his. Anna's though is kind of amusing to me in that Kate's-going-straight-to-hell kind of way. Some people I just enjoy seeing miserable, and the worst part is that I've never even met her. Needless to say she's not in a happy place and is airing it on her weblog for all the world to wallow in her misery with her. Paper and pen would be a much more appropriate outlet, if she wasn't looking for the world's biggest pity party. Oh well... I really can't stand weak people.

Tomorrow is opening night. I'm so glad to be out of rehearsals. They were absolute torture. Thank god there will be some alcohol flowing after the show... (no worries, Brian and friends, I think the party venue is a bit too classy for Flamming Dr. Peppers) I hope to take pictures in costume and fancy party clothes and post later this week.

One last thing, Shannon, if you're going to go through my stuff while I'm not home, don't write about it in your weblog... hello!?

Saturday, September 04, 2004

the morning report

Please excuse my inability to respond to phone calls, im's, and emails. I'm in the midst of tech hell (believe me, this one is hell). I'm also in a funky mood because someone is headed out of town on monday... :-( I'll do my best to be better.

Mike, sorry I missed you on friday. I feel awful about it.

Seth, what the fuck is going on up there? I want a complete report, asap.

Thursday, September 02, 2004

another day in paradise


I think we are moving to the stage today.... whoo hooo! Meanwhile, memorizing like a mofo, for my understudy role. And getting over this very strange illness to hit me yesterday. Time to take out stock in tylenol.

I guess that's all today. Still waiting to hear from Susky... they have a board meeting tonight... Good luck to Brian on PSU auditions tonight. Kick ass.